Teens to Toons

Shrek….. seen it….rich heroine… ugly hero…. Topsy turvy story…. Yet a hit…point being… almost everyone we know doesn’t like the way they look..to varying degreees…probably see themselves as shrek… everyone fancies themselves as the underdog…the one who gets bitched about behind their backs… everyone is alone… yet together ..becasue we all think exactly the same….. as far as looks go that some people tend to think of it a lot more often than most…and a lot more often than we probably need to…. I am ugly… I cant figure how….(cause I kinda like my face when I look at it in the mirror …. Occasionally… I hate it at times…true….but I like it at times….it aint that bad ) … now the point isn’t that im not good looking..the point is that…I “think” im not good looking …and I let it keep me from doing so much that I shud….. I am simply not strong enough to reconcile with it and move on….while my dad…. (from whom I take my looks) is pretty cool abt it…now if he is pretending..he does a very good...

I was wondering about how to take rejection in life. I have this problem with inability to accept rejection. Recently I have been kicked in a couple of interviews and this makes me pretty mad at myself. I have been angry and because I had been hopeful, I was rolling in my own misery. Sleeping for 15 to 24 hours has been making me feel dreadful about myself. I think a depression is imminent and All i need is a good achievement, to get out of the rot. It was not that bad until it turned into mania... I just need a good thing to happen to me...

In life... sometimes people need to look at what happened and why? But sometimes people should just let the fuck that happened happen. Let go. The anger is sometimes tremendously exciting. That animalistic feeling is very enervating, very tragic actually. Somehow I feel, life cannot give me what I want. Life is not good enough, honest enough, loving enough to give me what I want. So what do I do? All that I can do is snatch it, take it away from life. How does one know what one wants and how much he wants it? Its about the things one is willing to give up and as a result forego in life to have it his way. This life will not end in a manner that had look like a failure to me. This life will see me willing to end it in a manner I see befitting. This life will see... just what and where I take it.