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I seem to be crying...

I could feel something in his rather gruff voice. He was not himself yesterday. I talked to him for long. I wanted to know what was troubling him.
I am so proud of him. He is one person I would live on for. He is one person to whom I can relate without words.
A double gold medallist in Mathematics and having recieved his gold medals from King (or Queen) of England. An IPS officer of batch of '47. A superb speaker of English and a great memory (which has faded visibly).
An honest and upright man who cared for none in his prime. Thirty Eight transfers in 35 years of service. People speak of him highly still. I once met a man who had joined Police Services in 70's and he was in awe of him still. "Srivastava Saheb jaise log ab kahaan hain". A DIG saying that for my Grand Dad.
I called him up in the afternoon. I wanted to talk to him while he was alone. And I asked him things, till he told me all. Money has all but gone in last years because of illness and foolishness of his children. A man like him ought to be worsipped. I worship him.
And he cried. A proud man crying is a great tragedy. And I said nothing for I understood him. I told him of what he could expect from me and he proudly wiped his tears away and betraying the tremor in his voice, called me a child.
I hate his children. How can someone just depend on their parents when they are in their late 80's. He is 87 and he wakes up at 0430 hours and walks for 5 kms faster than me. He has been doing that all his life. He is a good man. And they made him cry. And You (up there) just watched, while a proud man broke down in front of his Grand Son. I hate you all.
The only three person who I told about her, Dad and Nana were the ones who never said anything like "things happen and people move on". They understood the pain.
Nani is ill. He is tired and his kids are all self centered. I have to go and meet him. If I don't, I don't think I deserve to live on. I will go soon. I must.
I have to wipe his tears before I wipe mine.
Have some sense of justice, they say you are wise, up there.

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