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I have changed forever

Chaand ke saath kai dard puraane nikale...
kitne gham they, jo tere gham ke bahaane nikale...

Ab to rotaa bhi hoon to tasalli nahin hoti...
Kitnaa ro doon ki tum yaad naa aao...
Kitne saalon baad nikale hain yeh aansoo daaman bhigone...
aur ab jab nikale hain to zaalim rukte hi nahin...

You are the world to me... and as I say this.. I feel the torment which I always imagined as the greatest pain... Now I am too tired... I have aged in last five days and I feel tears welling up inside me... I have been a rock and now I am nothing... that is what you were to me...

Somerset wrote once, "There is no cruelty greater than a woman's to a man who loved her and whom, she does not love anymore. She has no kindness then, no tolerance even. She has only an insane irritation." Can you not be cruel to me... You have treated me with more affection that I ever deserved... Please make me mad at you... Make me feel ill and make me feel bad... so that I can get over you... I love you so...

I could only wonder at the thought. I couldn't love anything anymore. I am so ashamed of myself... I am so helpless... I let you go and you went away... for ever...

I guess I deserve this pain... Not many people will be patient enough to understand... where can I find someone like you... I will live in hope... I will... I promise

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